Confession of a Writer (Missionary)…..the world

And then I wonder (not so much), how much of lifes’ crisis are truly orchestrated by the “Big Wigs”……..While we are on the topic of Missionary Work. You grow up fast on the field. You learn to speak like you will never have another chance. You learn to see with your spirit, and every choice that you make surrounds the knowledge of good and evil. You love tenderly and rapidly, and you pray to be able to supply oil for everyones lamps, so that they may see what is ahead of them…..but you can’t.

So through play and love, I forewarn the one closest to me, who will listen and have the boldness to question….. my son. Through scripture I tell him to keep his eyes open, keep his heart guarded with truth…yet open. And, if you must lay down your life  for the cause of Christ….DO NOT be fearful . If you think those teachings are too much for a kid……there are children younger than him being raised to be martyrs, and take the lives of innocents. Americans are way too comfortable….EVEN many American Christians.

Through much of my own imperfections, I understand clearly, the times we are living in. Growing up Apostolic/ Pentecostal….you do not forget. We see events and happenings in the world, being prophetic….while the world sees it as unfortunate. From birth we raise our children to believe in the power of prayer. Last week I was extremely anguished and my 6 year old looks at me and calmly says: “Let God handle it.” Weights were lifted off of my shoulders, instantly.

We have to raise our children in this distrustful world to love at the same time know how to fight spiritual warfare, as they understand what it is. I cry often… guilt, that I actually brought my baby into such an evil world, at the same time, that I am not everything that he needs me to be……and I am not. I will never be. I always tell him, there is going to come a day where Mommy’s love just isn’t enough. Where Daddy is not enough strength for you. You need to be anchored in God, so that you can depend completely on His love. He attentively  listens and questions.

“Mommy, nobody is perfect….BUT GOD!”

“Light…ALWAYS wins!!!”

When I hear my boy say these things with such certainty and trust and boldness…..I get butterflies in my stomach and I just cry. It is a reminder from God, that I am doing an excellent job raising my Blessing.

Even in a world that is so blind and backwards….there is hope ,yet.


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